Dear Hollywood,
As parents, we are always sensitive to situations or people that can potentially bring harm to our children. This is even more so when we carry the title of "foster parent" or "adoptive parent." Movies and books that might be appropriate in a general setting can sometimes be a landmine for foster parents -- and adoptive parents of children who know they're adopted.
Recently parents have brought to our attention two movies that fall into that landmine category: "Three Stooges" and "Avengers."
After seeing the movie "Three Stooges," one mother shared that there are "a lot of bad remarks about adoption and foster care," and that one character says she refuses "to go to a house where people are paid to love her."
This might be innocent for some but for children in care, it can reinforce the "my life is bad because I'm in foster care" outlook.
In "Avengers," other parents have noted they could have done without one character's line in the movie. When the character Thor says, "He's adopted," in response to hearing his brother, a villain, has killed many people, it puts a bad taste in the mouth of adoptive parents. Imagine the potential hurt it could cause children who know that they are adopted.
The road traveled by children in care, through no fault of their own, is often filled with bumps, and as their caregivers, we tend to try extra hard to smooth the road, not add more potholes. Having said that, we're no prudes but it'd be nice to know -- from Hollywood -- beforehand if the "entertainment" we're viewing will cause discomfort for our children. Then we can do our part as parents and either decide not to view the movie with the children or have a "talk" prior to viewing to prepare them.
Let's work together on this.
Signed,
Concerned Foster and Adoptive Parents
